I Wear My Sunglasses So I Can Keep Track of the Visions

All growing up I had apocalyptic dreams, or dreams of disasters. Sometimes they were prophetic, other times when I expected a dream to be prophetic, it seemed like if I acted on something, that would change the outcome and it wouldn't be. In 2020 I started to get death visions. The first one was a dream, it was a near death experience that my dad had. I was experiencing it through his eyes and feeling all the pain. Then The moment that my (interesting that autotype suggested the right name for both instances) adopted grandfather passed away I knew, I was washing dishes and I felt his presence, and I "heard":him worry about his family and I felt his last bit of pain, numbness and dryness as he passed. When I was a child, I was much more intune, no one had told me yet that some things were 'crazy' if I came to a place where someone had died, I'd get a vision, a flash of seeing it through their eyes. One in particular really scared me. I was about 5 and I walked over to the edge of about a 9ft ledge and I had a vision of being a little boy about 4 and I look back because my mom (his mom) told me(him) to be careful Then being at the foot of the ledge dying looking up feeling all of his pain and fear(for years I remembered the boy's name that she called, I kinda hung on to it, now with all my memories of my children, that name has faded out). When my parents took me to a nursing home, I had so many different dreams and visions and energy that I swore most of my life that I would never go near another one or mental institution. Then as part of 'face your fear' mentality I went to work in nursing homes and mental institutions. And spent the next ten years working off and on in them, and loved it.

By jr. high I had learned that I had full control over my visions, could shut them off completely or experience them to varying degrees as I wanted, and I stopped having them with unknown people. Throughout my twenties I stopped having them all together and had rather forgot about the ones when I was little. Then I started getting them again. It's not like hallucinations, I've tried different drugs. When I feel one, now, I first feel a pain and fear that I know isn't mine. I can choose how far into it to go, if I lay down and fully experience it, I feel and experience it as if I am there in that body, or I can remain detached and write what they see and feel, how they died (though a lot are near death, not complete deaths). Sometimes I know exactly who it is and when, sometimes I never get a name. One, one of the first ones that I learned how much control I had, I didn't get a name in the vision, but then had synchronicities that told me who she was. I was laying down to bed feeling brokenhearted then I thought "No this is more than brokenhearted, I have actual immense pain in my chest," but as I thought that and felt my chest, I felt fine, as I started to relax into sleep, the pain was worse along with the thought that I had been shot in the chest and the sounds of helicopter blades deafeningly loud. I shook myself awake and I was in my bed fine. I started to go to sleep again and I heard the helicopter and felt an oxygen mask on my face and that intense pain in my chest. I heard "stay with me! open your eyes!" I opened my eyes and there was a air evac woman leaning over me holding the oxygen mask on my face. She was wheeling me on a stretcher to a helicopter. People were shouting orders everywhere. I tried to lean up and look at my chest and she put her hand on my forehead and said "You don't want to do that" Then things started to fade as I heard "we're loosing her" through a tunnel. And I opened my eyes in my room and couldn't go back to that. Over the next few days and weeks I started having synchronicities around an old highschool friend of mine that died from a gunshot to the chest, even though it happened years before. One of the most recent death that I experienced started with losing my hearing and an immense ringing in my ears and then I "felt" burning all over my back. I knew what this was and heard a woman thinking that it was a bomb blast. I decided to remain detached and dictate it instead, feeling all the pain from bomb blast injuries is on my list of things I never want to do (as I'm typing this I can feel the ghost of the pain, like as if my back was raw meat at one time and to talk about it makes it tingle.) This time I was able to "talk" to the woman experiencing it and get information. She said that her name was Melanie, she was military, I feel like navy but she didn't specifically say that. She was in an operating room but all the sounds were muffled from the hearing loss. Someone dropped a metal basin and as it clanged on the floor that noise got through. She was fighting all the pain that she was in, and I could feel where all her injuries were, though the pain wasn't as real as when I fully experience it. In my head, I said to her "give me your pain and relax" I felt the pain leave her, and leave me. I felt a connection with her for a few hours, and picked up memories. I looked up what the name Melanie means and found that it means darkness. I thought that was interesting considering that I had been studying Jung and the shadow self. Then I started getting synchronicities around her name.

In 2019 and peaking in 2020, I started having dreams with pronounced dream symbolism that were prophetic. But there were puzzles or symbology as to how they were prophetic or the information was encoded. For example I had a dream that jumped from scene to scene then in real life all those scenes with slight alterations happened in reverse order over the course of the next year. Or I was shown spiders in my dream and someone faced with a deep life choice, Then in real life, I would see the reflection of the choice in a more mundane life choice and see spiders or synchronicity around them. Often I would get the dream with a spider spirit telling me the interpretation of the dream. Then be shown how the choices, though they seem mundane or ritualistic, they are clues and communication in the spiritual realm of which paths we will choose and what timelines or quantum possible universes are likely to collapse. There's nodes. They see time as like building a web. And the idea that reality is made up of stories that need to be told, is intergral. Feeling their web was amazing... For some reason I always understand the spiders best, never had any arachnophobia, (though I have a healthy respect and avoidance of poisonous ones, but when I've been bitten by black widows and brown recluses, it never goes past forming the red target, then fades away) Sometimes I get dreams with other animal symbolism, but I struggle with the meanings of any of it. I've also had my children tell me about their dreams of story weaving spiders, i don't think it's just madness... For an example, I had a dream that my husband would be given a choice about something and if he chose wrong it would lead to a timeline with drastic consequences for our children. Then I was shown symbolically that with a dream about oversized spiders and one goes to grab my youngest daughter and I pull her away and it releases a gas that puts my daughter to sleep, and because of the choices that my husband made he couldn't move except yell out "no! " when it released the gas, and I save my children from the spiders myself. Now I had this dream in the summer of 2020 All I knew upon awakening was that my husband would make a choice between something and his children that would lead to an inevitably that would endanger my children. Upon awakening my husband was wanting to take the car and go do something probably get drugs and I told him no because our daughter had a specialist Dr appointment in the city. We got into a fight an he took the car and she missed the appointment. Later this missed appointment was used as evidence in court against me after they took my children out of my arms, while my husband sat there only yelling out "no!" when the cops started to beat me. After I had the dream in 2020, A golden orb weaver spun a web on my porch, my husband knocked down her egg sac and I saved it. Now in 2023 I've got my children back and my son started pointing out golden orb weaver synchronicity then I had a dream of a spider fixing it's web then I woke up to a text saying that I had missed an appointment with that same specialist for my daughter because it had been made six months before...

Usually the nodes involve choices, and karma. There's a ying and yang and mirrored pattern to it. depending on the type of event there's either straight line connections or specific scenes connecting or there's ripples, circles of waves of events replaying in different ways with different characters.

I haven't dug too deeply into what other people say about the spidees so as not to cloud what I am told in the dreams. but just now, looking it up, I found this confirmation if only subjectively since you don't know that I didn't already see this: https://youtu.be/jlLaGsRqdec P.S. I weave dreamcatchers, ask sotogirl ;) In

In the middle of all of this, there was also lines, dreams and events involving owls too, I don't think that I am supposed to mention some of that yet... https://www.thehighersidechats.com/grant-cameron-ufology-consciousness-the-alien-apports/