Time Stamps

So I looked more into one of the instances of looking up booking flights, Dec 14, and I posted on mcmmm about having a cat go into the cabinet, then no time passing and letting him in through the back door. I think that things not matching up like that are a sign of the blocked memory of setting up a flight. Then the next two weeks, a number of times I felt like things were deeply deeply off. It was sometime between the 14th and the 25th that I remember having the memory of holding pictures of my children and someone saying "these aren't your children but you are going to pretend that they are" and me thinking "Gawd what kind of op are they running that they would do something like this? Trying to convince a part of me that my children aren't my children and to try to get me to internalize it by believing that I was pretending. Thank God that I crossed myself and caught this." I'm reading the book The minds of Billy Milligan, and worrying that I might find out that I'm like that, (though as far as I can tell I'm not) and that I'm innately unlovable because of it. The only way to it is through it, and we're a product of our environment. My dad's story I related some here, but my first husband, my second husband and the last guy I dated, and another guy I knew all had multiple personalities with different names and attributes. Most used their middle names versus their first names and everything would change. My dad worked on fixing himself. Only my first husband would try to make a distinction that he was fully a different person. When he was abusing me, his knowledge base, voice, demeanor and everything would change and he has very adamant that he was Earnest and not Mark. Then when he was Mark he would claim that he himself had no memory of what he did to me. I eventually caught on and tried to talk to Earnest and all hell broke loose and I ran. But he used to say that his vision would suddenly go red, then he would have missing time. It was the most pronounced in my ex boyfriend, but I'd seen enough then to recognize it. That guy I knew was the only one that talked to me in different languages with different personalities and then tried to reinsert himself in my life under a different persona with backstory and everything, it was pretty convincing, but he stopped when he saw that I recognized him. In the book, the writer mentions that the Billy makes a pyramid with his hands whenever the lead personalty comes out. In 2020 I noticed my dad and my ex husband doing this whenever they got an authoratative personality that would talk about agencies or the game. I've also seen a number of other people do this and saw I think Fauci do it. I thought it was some hand dingaling of a posthypnotic suggestion to use both sides of my brain to listen. I've since practiced doing it and found that it helps me to remember things especially when it comes to electronics and physics. On a side note of relief, I know that I'm not an assassin, once I went to my dad, saying that I didn't feel at all prepared or trained or expected what happened in reference to the hypnosis and stuff. He got mad, and said "Damnit! What more training do you want?! Geez the only other thing is to be trained as an assassin, and I don't think you want that!" I said "No I don't," and left, confused, because I don't remember any training, just what seems to be hypnosis, torture, control and programming, all the things he claimed to be against. Update, I did more digging around what was going on during those two times when I was looking up about booking a flight, (haven't found out where, for sure, but one had things about the Philippines wtf?[though I doubt it i don't have a passport, but if it's possible to block out flying then that could be too]) And then comparing what I said and timestamps. AFTER BOTH OF THEM I got sick with Covid and couldn't remember anything because I was so sick, how convenient, what really is COVID? and at least one of them, afterward my son said that I had my ex husband watch the children, again, WTF?